TOPIC 10 Week 20 THE CHRISTIAN FAMILY: The Church at Home
Sub-Topic: Week 22 ( May 26- June 1) : Marriage and Family: the Wellspring of Life and Love in the Church
In his Post Synodal Exhortation, Amoris Laetitia, Pope Francis presents powerful and insightful description of the realities that beset marriage and family, citing both the lights and shadows that mark these realities. He first cites the observation of the Spanish bishops who note that “families have come to enjoy greater freedom ‘through an equitable distribution of duties, responsibilities and tasks”; that “a greater emphasis on personal communication between the spouses helps to make family life more humane’, and that it is also evident that ‘the principal tendencies in anthropological-cultural changes” are leading “individuals, in personal and family life, to receive less and less support from social structures than in the past’ (AL 32).
In contrast, Pope Francis also explains that there is in our society the “an extreme individualism which weakens family bonds and ends up considering each member of the family as an isolated unit, leading in some cases to the idea that one’s personality is shaped by his or her desires, which are considered absolute”. He further explains that this extreme individualism, coupled with the desire for possessions and pleasures, leads to intolerance and hostility in families (AL 33).
Other threats to the family which Pope Francis mentions in his exhortation are:
- today’s fast pace of life, stress and the organization of society and labour which militate against permanent decisions and thus threaten the very institution of marriage which rests on the bedrock of commitment.
- widespread uncertainty and ambiguity which puts a premium on the value a personalism that opts for authenticity as opposed to mere conformity. He explains that while “this can favour spontaneity and a better use of people’s talents, if misdirected it can foster attitudes of constant suspicion, fear of commitment, self-centredness and arrogance.
- the freedom of choice which makes it possible to plan our lives and to make the most of ourselves may turn out to be a threat especially when it lacks noble goals or personal discipline because it will degenerate into an inability to give oneself generously to others.
- the praiseworthy concern for justice if misunderstood, can turn citizens into clients interested solely in the provision of services
- the decreasing number of marriages induce more and more people are to choose to live alone or simply to spend time together without cohabiting.
Pope Francis, however, stresses that “there is no sense in simply decrying present-day evils, as if this could change things. Nor it is helpful to try to impose rules by sheer authority”. He explains that what is needed is “a more responsible and generous effort to present the reasons and motivations for choosing marriage and the family, and in this way to help men and women better to respond to the grace that God offers them (AL 35) He adds that there is also a need to be humble and realistic, acknowledging that at times the way we present our Christian beliefs and treat other people has helped contribute to today’s problematic situation and to have a healthy dose of self-criticism (AL 36).
Pope Francis also invites us to examine how we present marriage to various audiences. He observes that, “we often present marriage in such a way that its unitive meaning, its call to grow in love and its ideal of mutual assistance are overshadowed by an almost exclusive insistence on the duty of procreation”. e also laments that we have not “always provided solid guidance to young married couples, understanding their timetables, their way of thinking and their concrete concerns” and that “at times we have also proposed a far too abstract and almost artificial theological ideal of marriage, far removed from the concrete situations and practical possibilities of real families.” He warns that “this excessive idealization, especially when we have failed to inspire trust in God’s grace, has not helped to make marriage more desirable and attractive, but quite the opposite” (AL, 36).
Finally, Pope Francis exhorts us to encourage openness to grace and not simply stress doctrinal, bioethical and moral issues, in order to provide sufficient support to families, to strengthen the marriage bond and to give meaning to marital life. According to him, without openness to grace, we will find it difficult to present marriage more as a dynamic path to personal development and fulfillment rather than as a lifelong burden (AL 37).
In the context of the Filipino family, the Catechism for Filipino Catholics observes that “most Christian Filipinos connect the family with God creating Adam and Eve through love, and calling them to mutual love, since He made them in the image and likeness of Himself who is absolute and unfailing Love. They thus realize in a general way that man and woman are created for one another, to unite and become one flesh in a communion of love that grounds their marriage and family life. But perhaps many do not reflect, amidst all the difficulties of family life today, how the family union is modeled on the covenant God made with his people when He promised them unswerving fidelity and love (CFC 1012).
Word of God
First Reading: GENESIS 2:18;21-24
The LORD God said:
It is not good for the man to be alone.
I will make a helper suited to him.
So the LORD God cast a deep sleep on the man,
and while he was asleep, he took out one of his ribs
and closed up its place with flesh.
The LORD God then built the rib
that he had taken from the man into a woman.
When he brought her to the man, the man said:
“This one, at last, is bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
This one shall be called ‘woman,’ for out of man this one has been taken.”
That is why a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, and the two of them become one body.*
Res. Ps.: Psalm 85:11-14
Love
and truth will meet;
justice and peace will kiss.
Truth will spring from the earth;
justice will look down from heaven.
Yes, the LORD will grant his bounty;
our land will yield its produce.
Justice will march before him,
and make a way for his footsteps.
Second Reading: HEB. 13:4-5
Let marriage be honored among all and the marriage bed be kept undefiled, for God will judge the immoral and adulterers.
Let your life be free from love of money but be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never forsake you or abandon you
Gospel: LK. 2:41-52
THE BOY JESUS IN THE TEMPLE
Each year his parents went to Jerusalem for the feast of Passover, and when he was twelve years old, they went up according to festival custom. After they had completed its days, as they were returning, the boy Jesus remained behind in Jerusalem, but his parents did not know it. Thinking that he was in the caravan, they journeyed for a day and looked for him among their relatives and acquaintances, but not finding him, they returned to Jerusalem to look for him. After three days they found him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions, and all who heard him were astounded at his understanding and his answers. When his parents saw him, they were astonished, and his mother said to him, “Son, why have you done this to us? Your father and I have been looking for you with great anxiety.” And he said to them, “Why were you looking for me? Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house?” But they did not understand what he said to them. He went down with them and came to Nazareth, and was obedient to them; and his mother kept all these things in her heart. And Jesus advanced [in] wisdom and age and favor before God and man.
Values/Attitude
Selflessness Detachment Patience
Simplicity Love Generosity
Doctrine
Love as the Principle and Power of Communion
The family, which is founded and given life by love, is a community of persons: of husband and wife, of parents and children, of relatives. Its first task is to live with fidelity the reality of communion in a constant effort to develop an authentic community of persons.
The inner principle of that task, its permanent power and its final goal is love: without love the family is not a community of persons and, in the same way, without love the family cannot live, grow and perfect itself as a community of persons.
The love between husband and wife and, in a derivatory and broader way, the love between members of the same family-between parents and children, brothers and sisters and relatives and members of the household-is given life and sustenance by an unceasing inner dynamism leading the family to ever deeper and more intense communion, which is the foundation and soul of the community of marriage and the family (FC, 18).
Moral
Inspired and sustained
by the new commandment of love, the Christian family welcomes, respects and
serves every human being, considering each one in his or her dignity as a
person and as a child of God.
It should be so especially between husband and wife and within the family, through a daily effort to promote a truly personal community, initiated and fostered by an inner communion of love. This way of life should then be extended to the wider circle of the ecclesial community of which the Christian family is a part. Thanks to love within the family, the Church can and ought to take on a more homelike or family dimension, developing a more human and fraternal style of relationships.
Love, too, goes beyond our brothers and sisters of the same faith since “everybody is my brother or sister.” In each individual, especially in the poor, the weak, and those who suffer or are unjustly treated, love knows how to discover the face of Christ, and discover a fellow human being to be loved and served. (FC 64).
Worship
Mutual self-giving in the sacrament
of matrimony is grounded in the grace of baptism, which establishes the
foundational covenant of every person with Christ in the Church. In accepting
each other, and with Christ’s grace, the engaged couple promise each other
total selfgiving, faithfulness and openness to new life. The couple recognizes
these elements as constitutive of marriage, gifts offered to them by God, and
take seriously their mutual commitment, in God’s name and in the presence of
the Church. Faith thus makes it possible for them to assume the goods of
marriage as commitments that can be better kept through the help of the grace
of the sacrament(AL, 73).
Faith Realities in Local
Context
The
Filipino family, caught in rapid changes in society mired in individualism,
materialism, securalism and alienation, needs to look deeply into itself and
reflect on the original design of God for marriage and the family – a community
where love is alive and life is nurtured. A fruit of this reflection invites
you to engage in your own self-introspection and to design ways on how you
will:
- help nurture the love and commitment of your parents for each otheryou’re your love and commitment to them and your siblings;
- share with other families the joy of the message of God’s love for each and every family;
- ensure that the sacredness of life is upheld and how each person, not only the members of your family experience fullness of life?
Faith
Response
Affirmation/Conviction
Noted
for our love of family and child-centeredness, we Filipino Christians would seem
to have little difficulty with the Fourth Commandment. Yet, problems do
arise. To address these problems, first, parents and children alike must
learn how to communicate with one another openly and deeply, in a
loving, forgiving, mutually supporting atmosphere that is honest and truthful. Secondly,
parents as well as children must be willing to admit errors, since:
a) no one is perfect or sinless; b) loving forgiveness is what Christ asks of
all; and c) truth and a proper sense of right and wrong are the only bases for
genuine forgiveness and interpersonal relationships. Thirdly, the whole
family must look beyond itself and strive to offer Christian witness of
the Gospel values of jus-tice and protection of human rights to the wider
Philippine community of town, province, region, and nation. (cf’ CFC, 1027).
Action/Commitment: As a member of the larger family of God, the
Church, the responsibility to keep the family a cradle of love and life, do you:
* honor
your parents, obey and respect them, pray for them and make a commitment to
care for them, especially in their older years? in your own capacity as a young
person assume an important responsibility you received when you were baptized,
that is, to spread the good news of salvation?
* witness to the love of Christ by genuinely giving up the comforts you wish to
enjoy for the sake of your parents and siblings?
*actively participate in reaching out to other families, especially those who
are in the margins of society for them to see the love of God for them through
you?
Celebration/Prayer
St. Joseph was “a
just man,” a tireless worker, the upright guardian of those entrusted to
his care. May he always guard, protect and enlighten families.
May the Virgin Mary, who is the Mother of the Church, also be the Mother of
“the Church of the home.” Thanks to her motherly aid, may each
Christian family really become a “little Church” in which the mystery
of the Church of Christ is mirrored and given new life. May she, the Handmaid
of the Lord, be an example of humble and generous acceptance of the will of
God. May she, the Sorrowful Mother at the foot of the Cross, comfort the
sufferings and dry the tears of those in distress because of the difficulties of
their families.
May Christ the Lord, the Universal King, the King of Families, be present in
every Christian home as He was at Cana, bestowing light, joy, serenity and
strength. On the solemn day dedicated to His Kingship I beg of Him that every
family may generously make its own contribution to the coming of His Kingdom in
the world-“a kingdom of truth and life, a kingdom of holiness and grace, a
kingdom of justice, love, and peace,” [183] towards
which history is journeying.
I entrust each family to Him, to Mary, and to Joseph. To their hands and their
hearts I offer this Exhortation: may it be they who present it to you,
venerable Brothers and beloved sons and daughters, and may it be they who open
your hearts to the light that the Gospel sheds on every family.
I assure you all of my constant prayers and I cordially impart the apostolic
blessing to each and every one of you, in the name of the Father, and of the
Son, and of the Holy Spirit.
-Familiaris Consortio, St. Pope John Paul, II-
